NYman is a paternity fraud victim

May 12, 2001

Paternity, Divorce and Men’s Rights

I am sending out this story to anyone who will listen. Today men who have proven by paternity testing not to be the biological father are still made to pay child support and are threatened by loss of licenses and even jail.

Some ten years ago I married a woman 20 years my junior. This was a second marriage for me and a first for her, with the clear understanding that I did not wish any children out of this marriage. She consented to this and we got married.

Due to medical reasons, my wife was forced to go off medical contraception and we had to revert to less than perfect birth control methods. One day she announced to me that she was pregnant. I immediately asked her to have an abortion to which she initially consented to and for which she was actually scheduled. Later I received phone calls from her Obstetrician with the strong recommendation not to go through with this. After many discussions I felt that I had no choice but agree to this baby even though I was 44 years old at the time and already had one child from my previous marriage.

The child was born premature but did fine and I became a father. Some 2 years later I received a phone call from a person who claimed to have had an affair with my wife and suggested that the child was probably his. I confronted my wife who denied this allegation, stating that this person had been harassing her. I wanted to believe her and agreed to let the issue go.

However after some time (2 years to be exact) I again became suspicious and in my desperation taped all phone conversations, unfortunately confirming my suspicion, that indeed she had an affair and was contacting the person, who originally phoned me, calling him the father of the child.

This led to divorce proceedings, which, without going into details, did wind up in Supreme Court. I could not introduce the telephone taping as evidence and it became quite apparent that the paternity issue was not going to be handled with any speed. The court was more interested in issues of my not paying interim support payments when in fact we were living in the same house and I was taking care of all the payments. The court appointed a legal guardian for the child whose basic concern was to keep the child free from any stress and not to cause and damage to the child’s psyche.